My little Bony summoned the pack to meet at Last Call Norm and Pear Necklace’s house. This turned out to be one of the only good things I can say about this week’s hash. My little Bony left his bar stool at the Double Oh long enough to join the pack for a beer, walk off, throw a little flour, and go right back to the bar. His stool was probably still warm when he returned. We know this because Virgin Kalena (friend of Pearl and Norm), stopped at the bar to use the restroom and spotted him sitting at the bar. We found this out at beer check.
Anyway, the pack headed out, following a flour trail that lead us to the Shoppers Corner parking lot and seemed to end there. Someone finally found flour way over across the street in the Buttery parking lot. The drops of flour were few and far between for the remainder of the trail. Some of the marks did not make sense (square around a fire hydrant). The trail switched sides of the street multiple times, and was described as a cluster fuck, schizophrenic, and traipsing trail backwards. We were directed to stop at a church, probably to pray for the trail to end. We ran into a wacky Asian guy who was hanging out on the corner near a senior center, who asked what was going on, then ran away yelling something about promising us eternal freedom. At that point, all I wanted was a cold beer!
Beer check was in the parking lot behind the Buttery. The Mystery Co-Hare was revealed. It turned out to be Loose Stool, an old friend of My Little Bony, who doesn’t hash anymore. He took off before Religion. Tiny Whiny Bitch, Hairy Fuck 2.5, and Cuff my Muff missed Beer Check and were found back at Pearl and Norm’s house.
Tiny Whiny Bitch was RA and appointed Cuff my Muff as his Beer Fairy. Bony ‘s first, of many down downs was for a cluster fuck of a trail and received a lecture on how chalk is our friend. Cuff my Muff took a down down. Shallow Hole and Occasional Rapist were given a down down for writing lies in last week’s Hash Trash (not quite sure what we lied about though). Wicked Retahted was punished for peeing on a fence and ridiculed for shaking it more than 3 times. Bony was serenaded with a Lovely rendition of Happy Birthday. Crimes on trail included Cuff my Muff for posting on Facebook while on trail. Banana Basher was congratulated on his 600th Surf City Hash. Back sliders Pearl, Norm and Loose Stool (Bony did his down down for him). Virgin Kalena was introduced to the pack and told a lame joke.
And the Hares……………….. Give them chalk!
Many thanks to our hosts Last Call Norm and Pearl Necklace for letting a bunch of unruly hashers gather in their back yard.
On On,
Shallow Hole