This week our Hares, Princess Di (arrhea) and her partner in crime Thmp-Thmp, promised a trail full of champagne wishes and caviar dreams. Instead of an episode of Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous, this was more like Lifestyles of the Drunk and Demented. This ship of fools docked at Brady’s Yacht Club on Seabright Ave. The usual suspects were there. Dung Fu Grip got a job in Santa Cruz, so he’s officially a Surf City Hasher now. It was nice to see Banana Basher made it to the hash again this week! Shiny Snail Trail brought a Virgin! Virgin Adam had no idea what he was getting into! I’m guessing he may have been bribed with sexual favors. Twat did you Say? was there. She doesn’t have class anymore, so she has no excuse not to come to the hash. In case you were wondering, Deep Stroke hasn’t left town yet. The RV is in the shop again. She did take a little trip on her bike from San Francisco to LA. She rode over 500 miles for charity. Now that’s what you call a racist!
The Hares promised beer, liquor, a Turkey- Eagle split and they sailed away. The pack circled up out the back door, then headed out. The trail wandered around Seabright neighborhoods, through Fredrick Street Park, down a steep embankment to the Harbor. The trail headed left, went around the end of the harbor and up the stairs near the RV camping area. At the top of the stairs, we found a bottle of champagne! No caviar though. It was too high class for Hugh Heifer, so she didn’t have any. Not a big surprise. The flour lead us in the direction of 7th ave, toward the ocean.
Somewhere along the way, Shiny Snail Trail spotted a big, heavy wicker chair on the side of the road that was left out for trash. She decided to pick it up and carry it for the rest of the trail. I bet her arms were sore for a few days. After some confusing checks, the pack made their way back to the Harbor by the Crow’s Nest. It was then we figured out where the Turkey- Eagle split was. Turkeys could take the water taxi to the other side and Eagles could run around.
Beer check was at a nice spot overlooking the beach. Waxi Pad left the Crow’s Nest beach party and found trail and made it to beer check. The non-runners were already there. Pink Cherry Licker is getting pretty good at short cutting, because she always seems to find her way to the booze.
Religion was held at the Santa Cruz Museum of Natural History. dBASED was RA, and wanted to use the outdoor amphitheater for religion. As usual, he was his own Beer Fairy. TIMMY!!! got the first down down for losing the hash shit and never recovering it. Pink Cherry Licker told a story about being propositioned by a lesbian at the bar right in front of her Dad. She turned her down. Occasional Rapist and Shiny Snail trail drank for taking a “pee check” together.
There were a few Analversaries this week. Deep Stroke celebrated her 69th Surf City Hash, Wicked Retahted drank for surviving 50 hashes and newbie Cumcerto celebrated her 25th hash. Deep Stroke and Cumcerto drank again for forgetting to take off their hats. Wicked has been through this so many times that he knows the drill and removed his hat before taking his down down. The Hares were called up for providing champagne, which was too “high class” for the hash. They said it cost 4 bucks and it wax expired!
Virgin Adam was called up and welcomed to the hash. Shiny Snail trail made him cum! He told the worst joke ever. Slonad and Wicked Retahted were chastised for being backsliders. Shiny Snail Trail was called up for “show and tell” with her wicker chair. And last but not least, the Hares……………………………..
Announcements:
July 4, 2013: Make sure you exercise your freedom to drink and to start your Fourth of July Holiday by showing up at the hash tomorrow at 11:00 am! We’re not starting at a bar this week. The address is 313 Pestana Ave., Santa Cruz, CA 95065. Princess Di (arrhea) and Cumcerto are promising us weenies!
Mark your calendars for Wharf to Barf, July 25-28th. Yes Wankers, this is the Anal Surf City event that includes lots of beer, Prelube hash Thursday, pub crawl on Friday night, Hash BBQ with Waxi Pad’s band on Saturday and another hash Sunday afternoon. Pay up by July 4th before the price goes up! Wharf to Barf info and rego: https://www.sch3.net/wharf-to-barf/
August 24, 2113 at 2:30 pm. The M Word Run: Occasional Rapist and dBASED’s hash wedding (or intervention if you want to talk her out of the real wedding) at Last Call Norm’s House, 520 Soquel Ave, Santa Cruz https://www.sch3.net/mword/mwordrun.pdf
On On,
Shallow Hole