This year’s Beat Your Meat was held at Drill Me’s house in Scotts Valley.

Somehow dBASED talked his dentist into hosting the event.  I’m sure it’s a decision that she surely regrets by now.  Drill Me used to hash with Monterey Bay, and hasn’t hashed in the 15 years since Surf City H3 has been in existence.  dBASED said she put a lot of work into clearing trails on her property for the event.  She has a gorgeous property with friendly horses off of Vine Hill.  The event was a huge success!  We raised over $800 bucks for Second Harvest Food Bank!  Yay!  We really are a legitimate nonprofit organization and not a bunch of drunks who don’t care!

dBASED and Drill Me were the hares. The Eagle trail was less than 2 miles on my GPS.  And it was all up hill.  My calves were burning like hell.  Damn you hares!  There was a decomposed skunk carcass on trail, but we did not encounter any live animals.

The potluck was awesome and Accuprick and Butt Balls cooked up all the meat and meat alternatives. Instead of their fancy gas grills, they managed to cook everything on 2 small charcoal grills.  The food took a little longer to cook so hashers mingled around the grills salivating, and patiently waiting for their meat to cook.  Dog Breath was caught trying to steal Timmy’s steak, but gave it back (with a few bites missing).   He’s a typical dog that steals food from little kids and handicapped people.

Accuprick was RA and Pink Cherry Licker was Beer Fairy. Visitors- Arabian Goggler, Piss Pyle, BMX, Just Matt, Spreads in the Sheets, Gay for Pay, eh?, Tipper in the Slipper were welcomed to the hash with a down down.  Waxi Pad and Snapping Twat drank for being backsliders.  Hugh Heifer and Cumfart Zone drank for somehow getting lost on the turkey trail.  Stoners!  They did manage to find their way back and hit the beer check.  Pink Cherry Licker also got lost.   She apparently texted she couldn’t find beer check.  It was just up the road from the house on the same street. Princess Di (arrhea) and Occasional Rapist couldn’t handle the difficult trail, so they turned back.  Extra money was raised by Tits and Game and Cumfart Zone for bouncing on the trampoline topless.  Virgin Matt flashed front and back.  Tits and Game made him cum!  Yellow Prick Load celebrated his 25^th Surf City hash!  It took years, but he made it!  Accuprick said he was the bastard who named him in Silicone Valley.  He got his name because he liked to wear yellow, was skinny and looked like a banana.  He even has his own song called “Swallow the yellow prick load”!  Fap jack took off early, but then got blamed for not doing a good job of getting the grills started  for Butt Balls when he went to the beer check.   Goggler was his stunt drinker.  Dog Breath was punished for stealing Timmy’s steak.  Jizziki got the award for the best meat.  It was marinated in his “special sauce”.  I had some and it was really good.  So tender it melted in your mouth.   And last but not least, the Hares……………….

On On,

Shallow Hole