Well, after a 2 week hiatus from hashing I ( CFZ) showed up late to the party….apparently missed the killer shrimp/avocado combo, the hot java with booze and the fluffy fantastic homemade whipped cream and other gastronomic delights. CRAP!! Bah f*ing Humbug.
When I arrived the pack was already off on the pre-laid trail but as I am parking I run into them….well not literally…..but they are not hard to miss…with their silly sweaters and reindeer headbands, annoying blinking lights glaring, red tights and candy cane socks.
So I try to play catch up….what is up with the pre-lay I ask? Nobody seems to really know what’s going on and what exactly is the point of this circle jerk exercise.
It seems that at every street corner dBased is hovering around the pack like a hungry vulture trying to make sure all the hounds follow numerous and excessive Turkey/Eagle splits. The pack is quite befuddled by his presence. Like Pavlov’s dogs they are accustomed to a certain behavioral pattern…the hare leaves 15 minutes early and the pack follows the markings, eager to catch the hare. But in this instance the hare was in their face the whole time. So what to do with this recalcitrant hare??
I could think of a few things!
But I’d rather think of getting warm and out of the cold…..as did a few other folks who finally bailed on the “trail”. We sauntered back to the start but found ourselves locked out of the condo….not to worry though as we performed a quick B&E (breaking and entering) and made a beeline to the booze and leftover scraps of salsa and chips.
Soon after the rest of the gang showed up Occasional broke out the real food that had been hiding in the oven! Authentic tamales from Watsonville. There is a God/goddess/Santa!!!
These were a big hit especially doused in that zippy green sauce. Lots of licking and slurping going on. Think food orgy with clothes on.
For religion we gathered around the fire pit for the usual nonsense. The big winner of the night was Puff who has logged in 875 hashes!!
And speaking of Puff….he graciously handed out his annual holiday gifts to all in attendance. What a stand up guy! I take back all the snide remarks I have made behind his back about those outdated OP’s!!
Oh and before I forget We did have a naming…..for the dog belonging to bakers doesn’t….and it shall now be known as short stack.
Seems fitting and keeps with the ever present food theme
In the end it was a lovely evening hosted by Dbased and occasional rapist with a little help from their friends
So in keeping with the spirit of this frosty holiday season just remember a few things
1. You are a Hasher
2 there are no rules
3 you’re perfect just the way you are
4 we are a very inclusive group which is why you were are allowed to join despite your personal problems, bad hygiene and inability to get laid
5 it’s not just all about the drinking but as my aunt Charlotte who lived to be 105 would say “it couldn’t hurt”!
6 take a moment to remember those who have passed and those who maybe having health challenges at this time.
7 do something nice for yourself
8 do something nice for somebody else
9 be grateful that we have our little dysfunctional community that has become like a second family to many of us
10. And for the new year I wish all of you more peace love money clarity abundance insight balance and plenty of spirits!
Love and big hugs
Cum Fart Zone