We ranged far from home at the Rangeside Bar,

But did not feel ‘home on the range’ with Occasional Rapist and dBASED clubbing us with their hard wood. Scribe wishes he had gone to the driving range rather than being driven to the edge of extinction by this hare-pair. I do not include my friend Junk Puncher in the same clan as the dastardly-duo of humanoids. Here’s what the other two did to the pack.

The Rangeside Bar is a great place, sunny most of the time and has libations a-plenty to satisfy even the most discriminating palate. True to it’s reputation, the sun was out and the livin’ was easy high atop the hill housing DeLaveaga Golf Course, Driving Range and Disc Golf Course. Between the drinks and Dr. Midnight cookies, everyone seemed quite complacent. This is the usual ploy by hares not completely convinced their trail will prove acceptable.

Believing the pack had consumed sufficient alcohol, co-hares Occasional Rapist and dBASED(with Junk Puncher hiding behind them) delivered Instructions of Trail. It almost appeared the one hare did not know what the other was going to do or that they had two separate trails in mind. In the final analysis, it may HAVE been better if these two hares had not attempted to coordinate their respective trails. Hares away.

The next fifteen was spent finishing drinks, settling bar tabs and attempting to finish off the Dr. Midnight cookies. We were unsuccessful in the latter endeavor but TIMMY!! ‘volunteered’ to stash the uneaten cookies in his backpack. How magnanimous of him! After the passage of the fifteen, in the absence of our GMs, Pink Cherry Licker called for Circleup for Introductions and consequently heard from: Flours For Anal Bum, Cum,U Will Not!, Steamy Baanorrhea, TIMMY!, Oral D, Clearly Not a Hooker and Puff the Magic Drag Queen. This minuscule mob denotes the severe lack of faith the flock has in these two hares. Our lone canine companion was Spot’d Dick as Junk Puncher was co-haring. Pack out.

Trail progressed on-out to Upper Park Road and on-right all the way to Brookwood Drive and there it was on-left and (way) on-up to Hole 27 on the Disc Golf Course, colloquially called Top of the World. After a brief respite, the gang soldiered on and were directed on-left and on-down to La Corona Trail and on-left at that juncture. La Corona continues and then continues a lot more. There was only one interesting aspect and that was the word ‘look’ laid in flour along trail. It pointed up the side of the hill.

After the above was viewed, La Corona led us on as it had previously. Eventually it was on-left onto Wizard Hat followed by a quick on-left onto Enchanted Trail followed by an equally quick on-right onto DeLaveaga Upper Loop Trail. Mercifully soon, an on-left yielded into a parking lot opposite the clubhouse and it was here we encountered the hares chugging Beer Check beer.

After sufficient recuperation time, Pink Cherry Licker began Religion. Here’s a sampling of down-downs issued this evening: Cum,U Will Not! for falling down the hill leaving W2B Sunday; Cum,U Will Not! for finding a Yoda walking stick which was more fit for Gandalf; Oral D for not attending W2B in favor of a long weekend of unbridled sexual activity(!); a group of harriettes that followed PCL on trail; the Eagles were honored; TIMMY!! and Puff simply for being so damned old and analversaries were recognized. Oh. Hares. We loved the start location but let’s skip trail next time. This Hash is over. On-on-on was at Taqueria Santa Cruz conveniently located directly across the street from the One-Double-Oh-Seven.

The preceding was a factual accounting of actual events though possibly not as they actually occurred. One should never allow the facts to stand in the way of a good story. Do not allow the profound to become the enemy of the interesting.

A Scribe’s sole purpose is to provide entertainment to their kennel mates. whether or not they are successful in this endeavor is still a subject open to debate.

I chose not to complicate this Hash Trash with facts thereby allowing me to extract almost any end I desired. It was with this motive in mind i recounted the events that comprised Hash Twelve-59.

By Special Appointment of His Royal Majesty ‘G’, this Hash Trash has been compiled and printed by permission of no one other that the author at Santa Cruz, Ca., or elsewhere if need be, on this, the third day of August in the year of our Hash two-thousand twenty-three.

Submitted with all respect due,

Puff

the

Magic Drag Queen.