Our Hares Ralph-U-Crammed-In and dBASED summoned the pack to Bocci’s Cellar. dBASED appeared to be in a supporting role this week. Back slider, Diddler on the Roofie returned! He claimed that work was interfering with hashing. Lame excuse dude! We had a Virgin. Virgin Don met the hash in Scotts Valley on Conference Road. He heard us having Religion and came out of his driveway to see what all the ruckus was about. Someone offered him a beer, and instead of calling the cops, he decided to join us this week. Banana Basher made his second appearance in the past month! It was Just Mike’s 6th hash and was up for naming this week.
You heard the story about the tortoise and the hare, right? Well this is the story of the hare that was the tortoise. There was not just one, but three hare snarings. The customary 15 minute lead time was apparently not enough. Surf City usually does live trails. However, this was the case where a pre-lay would’ve been the way to go.
The pack followed flour on Encinal Street, and then headed towards Harvey West Park. We followed flour through the park into the woods.
The hares ignored the “closed trail” sign and continued on a single track trail, over a bridge to the end of Meadow road. There was a big 6 foot chain link fence blocking the exit. Dung Fu Grip’s first instinct was to climb the fence. He got yelled at by a neighbor. Luckily the fence was movable, and hashers got through without climbing it. During all the fence fiasco, Dung Fu Grip snared the hares. The guy who yelled at Dung Fu knew Puff, so he didn’t call the cops. The pack waited a bit to give the hares some time to get away, then proceeded down Meadow road, left on Sheldon Ave, left on Highland. As the FRB’s were going down the hill, we spotted the hares for the second time. Everybody hung out waiting for the hares to get away. The stoners got stoned. Dog Breath had time to do 25 sit ups. After about 10 minutes, the pack continued down the hill to High Street, down the trail back to Coral Street. The trail continued down Coral Street to the railroad tracks to Pioneer Street. Non-runners, Banana Basher and Wicked Retahted caught Ralph-U-Crammed-In on Pioneer Street. He handed them the flour and they finished marking the trail to Beer Check at the end of Pioneer Street.
Religion was at the usual spot on Pioneer Street by the railroad tracks. Accuprick was RA and Shiny Snail Trail was Beer Fairy. Diddler on the Roofie was called up for being a backslider. Broke Bench Mountain was called up for not doing trail. He’s been dieting and did a “real run” to burn more calories. Watch out! He may turn into a racist! Dog Breath made some false accusations. What else is new? Shiny Snail Trail, Occasional Rapist and Yours Truly were called up to perform the African Donkey Dick Dance we made up on trail. Virgin Don said we all made him cum and sang a song. Welcome to the hash. Second Cumming was called up for thinking today was Easter Sunday. Accuprick reoriented her to time and place. Dung Fu Grip, Cumcerto and Yours Truly were called up for snaring the hares. Thmp-Thmp was rewarded for chivalry on trail. He helped hashers and Nippleless Butt over a fence. Just Carolyn was called up for being a sissy. She got cramps and couldn’t finish trail. She met up with Banana Basher and Wicked Retahted in the cemetery and told incriminating stories about Shiny Snail Trail. Finger Nips was called up to tell the pack about some type of weed she smoked that gave her a 2 hour orgasm. Hot Damn! Hugh Heifer, Princess Di (arrhea) and Thmp-Thmp represented Surf City at Silicone Valley’s Red Dress Run last weekend and lived to tell about it.
We had a successful . He will be forever known as Hertz Indianus! Welcome to the hash!
And last but not least, The Hares………………………
On On,
Shallow Hole