Hello half minds, tales from last week’s trail! We all gathered at Ideal Bar and Grill (a fine establishment noted for their free birthday Prime Rib dinner’s) down at the base of the SC Wharf. It was nice and sunny. We we’re shocked to see newly rejoined to the hash (older) hasher’s named Daddy Warbucks and his Little wrinkled fanny side kick! We all we’re given  strict hash instructions to go outside at exactly 6:45PM and not to be late by the E-vile dBASED and his young son co-hort Hott Wheels

.  As it turned out it was the Trolley we we’re to jump on, only .25 butt Wet Feral Pussy even had that covered as she pulled out free Trolley passes! Whoo hoo no change needed there. It was actually a tame trail I hear. I had Nipple Butt and realized quickly from the start I’d likely not make the trolley and made plans to be in the know of where beer check was ahead of time (hey I run slow, ok), but we all lied and said he was a dog companion, I had my vet along to prove it, Wet Feral Pussy! So there we all we’re travelling along so happily in the tourist shame train to DT

at Aqua’s where we all jumped out to find trail. Just Andrea invited Wicked Rhutarded and I in for a free drink at Aqua Blue, how could we say no? She had thought the whole pack was coming in for a drink. Hell no! they’ve already found trail and we’re gone I proclaimed! Oh well, I said I know where beer check is, hee hee. As it turned out there’sanother reason I didn’t bother running trail (and it wasn’t because my fiance was the hare), there we’re several stores, business establishments

where trail ran through that likely would have given me the evil eye for bringing along Nipple Butt! So there, that was reason enough for me to skip straight threw to BC! I enoyed some quality social time with Just Andrea and convinced her to join Wicked and I to BC. Once we got onto the river walk we saw the pack running towards Broadway bridge on the other side. No one bothered to chase after us, the FRB said “we wanted to run true trail”. OK well BC we almost got busted by a cop and a security guard. We had to give bums some beer so they wouldn’t  rat on us hasher’s. Oh I also had to where the stupid HashShit, only good thing about the hashshit, is it provides good pocket space for my shit. Since I am the scribe I need my tools on trail don’t cha know! So everyone enjoyed a beer or 3, then dBASED left us to drive to Religion, we had to carry the fuckin cooler down the hill, thanks mother f_cker! Religion was quick and lame d/t the need to ditch the po po. The Po-lice that is… So what did we do? Accuprick was RA and Wet Feral Pussy got to be beer fairy for her first time–awwww…..Wicked got his very first 25th hash patch, back slider’s to infamous couple Danny Warbucks and Little Wrinkled fanny!, and that’s all I can recall pooper’s. Nothing stands out… except the fuckin’ hares!!

Ok don’t forget this week’s hash is Beat Your Meat #13, Hash #646, at Lil Anal Annie and Butt balls abode, bring your cash and or checkbook for Second Harvest Foodbank!!! and bring your MEAT to beat (and side dish to share)!!!

On On–Occasional Rapist

Remembering hash 641 gives me a headache, but here I go: This was our pre-lube hash for Wharf to Barf excuse me while I have to take breaks to barf…..This was Cum Rash’s first co-haring adventure with Shallow Hole. We started at the Seabright Brewery,we had a few visitor’s Grassy Ass , Mommy’s Little Cock Whore and Pussy Troupe.  Backslider’s Wicked Rhutarded, Stupid Pussy, Pixie, Little Anal Annie and Butt Balls joined us for this hash also. Just Petra decided to cum

back and get to know us more. Two canine hasher’s joined us Marley and Nipple butt.

We took off toward’s the harbor, we decided maybe the ferry would be involved but no, we ran on by over the bridge and along the harbor we then turned towards 7th ave. and toward’s the Harbor Cafe then right at the train tracks and Swan Lagoon park. I was part of the DFL pack and we decided to avoid the park all together and headed down the tracks to where the rest of the pack was near the Liquor Check, fruit flavored V8 and rum? Jungle juice baby.

We basically ran in a circle for about 2.5 miles. See map for details,

Beer check was at the harbor back entrance off to the right, and we moved closer to the street for religion as a neighbor was threatening to call the cops on us during beer check.

Luckily no cops came, and we enjoyed giving/getting down downs, Butt Balls and Accuprick were RA’s, Princess Di-arrea was beer fairy.  Down downs for :Backslider’s Wicked, Pixie, Stupid Pussy and the Visitors: Grassy Ass- San Diego H3, Pussy Toupe-Silicon Valley H3, 500 run’s to dBASED, and the fucking hares..

On On we went to the Lesbian Pizza joint with just Petra, Hot Wheels, myself and dBASED and Grassy Ass. Other’s went to the brewery or the bar next door.

Hangover Sunday W2B hash: What to say about this, it was hot, sweaty and short, like (1/2 a mile short) Hares: Pear Necklace and Banana

needed an extra 10 minute start to basically go buy beer at Shopper’s corner, for the beer check. On the plus side there was Plenty of cold beer, and food, and sun. Thanks to Last Call Norm and Pearl necklace for hosting. This was a great day to just sit and drink in the sun and chew the fat with us half-minds, we did a quick religion with Puff as RA, beer fairy I think was Banana. Too short and boring to remember.  Phyllis Driller, Cum Lord, and Blios con Burros was in attendance. Deep Stroke wore her watermelon head with pride one last time!

On oN….

Occasional…..

Howdey Hasher’s, I’m here to rehash the last hash #639. We started at The bar next door in SV. We had an oldtimer hasher Viagra Falls (10 years of no sch3 hashes) join us, as well as backslider’s Too drunk to fuck and his co-hort,  Get up and run ..bitch.  We also had some hasher family of dBASED, join in the fun, Little Spit, Hott Wheels and their cousin Virgin Jason.  I’m sure you can remember it was a very wet Thursday for most of us whom braved the “Tunnel” of hell. Hares dBASED and Shallow Hole drove us there, under Highway 17. I had Nipple butt with me following the trail of the pack, I nearly had to drag him a few feet. I waited until everyone went threw the tunnel as I think the noise scared him more then the water level and the darkness. Being the brave Boxer hasher dog he is though we made it threw.  Trail wasn’t long, but it did drag us threw some interesting terrain, mostly uphill asphalt, and shiggy filled with plenty of PO. I enjoyed seeing a very old barn on trail which I believe is old remnants of the Santa’s Village, that I never really remembering going too as a kid. I wasn’t DFL but a few of us did make it to beer check finally where we found the rest of the pack sucking down all the beer. We we’re all happy to get to the end because we all knew what we had in store, Food, and plenty of it.  We sang stupid songs again and made fun of our beer fairy Twat did you say. Puff got his #625 analversary, hares got down downs for getting us all “wet”,  Viagra falls for being a ten year backslider!, and all the old farts of this hash whom we’re >60 years old,  something about virgin Jason and baby penquins?,  and the fucking hares! Waxi pad didn’t run trail, he drove the Pussy wagon for most pussy’s, and he BBQ’d some of the best burger’s I think I’ve ever tasted! Everyone should be applauded for our feast this night as it was a shared adventure. Kudos to the hostess/ host for their pad.

On and On into tonight’s bash hash at JJ’s

cheery o

Occasional Rapist:)

What to say about this hash. For last minute planning Coka Cola and Hairy Potter steered us on an interesting trail. Start was at a great watering hole in Seabright, you know the one. We then we’re twarted down Seabright to Cayuga. The one highlight on Cayuga was when we ran past the cool corner where “Mom’s Corner” is at lower Cayuga near the 5 corner’s, a nice bench and water fountain to hang out at, even for the pooches. as we neared the Ocean View park the pack assumed we’d be greeted with a BC, but instead a bum wine check on a side trail. Wine was sweet and tasty for being cheap ass. Now this duo has some nice friends, especially for letting them bring us in for a beer check in their backyards. Always great houses too. This one even had a swanky guest cottage (where I’m certain a few of us left something in the toilet). Condoms could have come in handy for a few as there also was a cozy bed in there! No hens yet but a cute hen house there also.

Choka out did herself by making us guacamole! I think we devoured it in like 5 minutes or less! She forgot to take out the pitt though:0. Just Kidding, PLENTY of beer at the beer check, kudo’s to the hares on that one! Then a fast walk back to Casa de Puff for Religion. Where Puff offered to be RA, he elected dBASED for his beer mistress fairy. First down down was for all the hasher’s whom we’re not wearing any hash attire, of some sort. Wicked, Deep Stroke, choka, Little bony and Twat did you say, Cuff my muff (although she sat that one out). Thmp Thmp is good at bringing in the virgins, Sharon and Leroy, this couple travel around the states playing disc golf. So not likely we’ll be seeing them on regular bases, but they seemed to enjoy their time with us and promised to look up kennels in their future travels.  Leroy told some stupid Disneyland joke, and Sharon a Bill Gates “window” joke-lame, they’d be going home back to Ohio. Pussy Galore showed up with the keg she picked up for her camp out, auto hasher! Sunday semen got down down for major backsliding. Choka Cola got her 125th anal versary hash patch! We all sang Sit Tanya song to Little boney for losing yet another potential girlfriend to “moving”, um ya sure that’s always what they “tell him”. Ralphi you crammed in called dBASED on trail to tell him where to short cut trail? How did he even have his number? And why did he think dBASED needed to know how to shortcut trail he does this all the time anyhow. Maybe they got something going on we should know about? So his father -in -law TIMMY! got his down down. Lastly, Deep Stroke myself and Twat got down downs cause we work out with CC workout aka Deep stroke! Ok and Hash full moon campout was great fun!

On, On ON,

Occasional Rapist on out

Hash Trash #633

I like how Puff described his flash for this hash run, dBASED did turn Scotts Valley into Death Valley! The trail may not have been very long in distance–http://www.mapmyrun.com/routes/view/95983199

, but the terrain was hell. There was a nice /number of us this night, we started drinking at the best bar likely in SV, the Next Door. We even had a virgin Hare named  Zach show up, Thmp- Thmp made him cum. Trail started out front of the bar and we crossed over Scotts Valley Drive and up Glenwood to the SV High School. This is where the hell all began. Trail was scetchy at best. Luckily the temperature in this death valley was a cool upper 60’s. Lucky for us.

You can’t say dBASED did not warn us in his announcement. He did say bring a machete and climbing rope, these would have been nice to have. Weeds we’re higher than our knees.

I wore shorts which ended up working for me. Just Linda joined us, this is her 3rd hash run with us. Mother’s little felcher (MLF) and Sausage Slam made it out this night, and their baby hasher Brooke, her second hash count. They had the stroller but that did not deter MLF he pushed that stroller up both hills! A true hasher! I’ll let you view the map to see all the terrain, but basically up and down up and down and all around.

Just Linda was able to find one of dBASED caches in the Gleenwood housing projects.

Dog Breath snagged the hare at end of trail, dBASEDs’ half minded effort to plan a trail back along the same road, again? He was snagged before for this same tactic.

Hasher’s we’re rewarded some champagne at beer check with an engagement announcement of myself and dBASED, only to find out there wasn’t enough for all to toast or even enough beer. dBASED! Luckily for him hasher’s didn’t attack as religion (and more –beer –cooler) wasn’t far off down the parking lot.

Down down’s for -back slider’s MLF and Sausage slam

, -Just Linda for refusing to pay or take off her hat during her down down,-TIMMY! for his 325th HASH!!,-Virgin Zach-he took the “one ball will do” to seriously and showed us all his left ball!, glad he listen’s to us harriettes!, – Dog Breath cause he’s dog breath, and for hare snag,-DFL down down for TWAT did you say?

and the hare!

It all began, on the bend in Ben Lomond. Henfling’s, what a place. This was Hugh Heifer’s hangover birthday hash. She looked well relaxed having had the day off. On this night there was a small pack. dBASED, myself, TIMMY!, Puff TMDG, Deep Stroke, Thmp-Thmp. Princess Di-arreah.  Dr. Nappy Headed ho and Cumz out my nose of course stayed at camp. This was a short and sweaty trail, I say sweaty because the course was almost all up hill, all 1 mile of it!. dBASED was slow, he’s been down with kidney stones or something, running is slightly difficult for him (or anything else for that matter), and for the first time in my hashing dayz, he was DFL! He even got a ride back to religion. That is a first. Ok trail was actually kind of nice. The weather was very warm and pleasant. The houses we’re nice to look at. We even saw a couple of  female fawn boxer’s on trail, Nipple butt was hoping to get some action, but these girls wouldn’t have it! Beer check was just off Glen Arbor, in the back of Hugh’s truck. We all deserved this cold one! Then we headed down hill and down around the bend over the bridge to Hugh’s pad for more cold beers, yummy psychedelic chocolate cake made by HH daughter, black cherry and creamed jello shots, cheese and cracker’s! What a feast. Down down’s we’re given to Hairy fuck 2.5 and Cumm Lord for showing up and not hashing. Myself and dBASED got down down for GPS tech. fuck up for having different mileage to report, (of course mine was correct 1.14 miles to be exact). There was a horse on trail and dBASED and Princess Di-arreha got a down down for horse mischief, or something to that effect.  RA was Deep Stroke and her beer fairy was Thmp-Thmp, they did a fine job, and then the hare…. Happy belated birthday HH! Thanks for the hot and sweaty trail!

On and on we go…….

Occasional Rapist:)